The Shelf

I have been told more than once and BY more than one person that I live in denial. I really do not. I am not a confrontational person. I once explained it to someone this way: I just move stuff around the stove. Funny that I would use this analogy since I rarely use a stove. I have things that I just have to put on the back burner. I never deny that it is there. I may have something else on the front burner AND, there are times when all the burners are full and I just do not have another one -- I will stick that one in the oven. Eventually, when I am ready and the time is right I move it up to the front and the funny thing is, I usually wonder why I kept it back there so long. Is it because time really does heal? Probably. I have also referred to this as my Scarlett O'Hara approach to life. My two favorite parts in the movie are when she says, "I'll think about that tomorrow" and "As God is my witness, I will never go hungry again.". Scarlett was not strong enough THAT day to deal with it. She would deal with it tomorrow. Somehow fresh sunlight brings renewal and strength.





My Pastor preached a wonderful sermon today and I enjoyed all of it because I identified with it so well. At the end, Pastor asked everyone to close their eyes and bow their heads. Then he asked if there were things in our lives that we really need to give to God. I cannot remember his exact words. He then asked those who raised their hands to come to the front and said he wanted to pray for them. I watched as my daughter in law and my grandson went hand-in-hand down the isle. I thought of how hard it must be for her to be so far from her family and have those 3 precious kids. I began to bless her in my heart. I thought of how much I love her and how much I wish I could change things for her. Some things are just bigger than she is. If I love her that much, how much more does God love her. I felt such love for her. I wanted to just follow her, wrap my arms around her and tell "everything is going to be ok." I knew it was not what I need to do -- but oh how I wanted to. I stood in place between my son and my husband and thought "aaaah, this feels so good". As Pastor was praying I was reminded of my "stove stuff" and the occasional "oven stuff". I often say that I am going to lay it at the feet of Jesus. And yet, sometimes I take it back or I can just see it lying there. My mind wanders and I think of when I am standing at the feet of Jesus, will all my grief and sin be there visible? My prayer is that the crown I lay at His feet will cover my sin and my grief. The "feet of Jesus" always tugs at my heart. We had sang earlier about the feet of Jesus: ". . .sit at Your feet, lay back against you and feel your heart beat. It's overwhelming.". Pastor then asked those who had gathered around the front to close their eyes and imagine themselves in a room. There is nothing in this room but you and a shelf on the wall. A shelf that is secure and will not fall. He then told them to take their pain, sorrow, sickness, broken relationships, etc. and put them on this shelf. That shelf belongs to God and you do not need to carry it any longer -- it's bigger than you. God will take care of everything you put on the shelf.





Hmmmmmm! I think I need to turn some burners off. I think I need that shelf.





Father God, in the name of Jesus, I ask You to take the things in my life that I struggle with. Your Word teaches me that everything that concerns me You will perfect. Your Word instructs me that the battle is not mine but it is Yours. There are things in my life that are too big for me. I cannot fix them. I have left them on the back burner too long. I need to put them on the shelf, YOUR SHELF, Oh Lord. Amen

As I am a visual person, I needed to do this symbolically. I found a sturdy shelf in my home. I got a box out that someone had given me as a gift. I placed 3 hand written notes in my box and placed it on the shelf. I can't see them -- they are in God's shelf now. God will be faithful to complete what He has started. I may add to the box but I will not take from the box on the shelf.